skip to main |
skip to sidebar
Life is like a road. There are long and short roads; smooth and rocky roads; crooked and straight paths. In our life many roads would come our way as we journey through life. There are roads that lead to a life of single blessedness, marriage, and religious vocation. There are also roads that lead to fame and fortune on one hand, or isolation and poverty on the other. There are roads to happiness as there are roads to sadness, roads towards victory and jubilation, and roads leading to defeat and disappointment.
Just like any road, there are corners, detours, and crossroads in life. Perhaps the most perplexing road that you would encounter is a crossroad. With four roads to choose from and with limited knowledge on where they would go, which road will you take? What is the guarantee that we would choose the right one along the way? Would you take any road, or just stay where you are: in front of a crossroad?
There are no guarantees.
You do not really know where a road will lead you until you take it. There are no guarantees. This is one of the most important things you need to realize about life. Nobody said that choosing to do the right thing all the time would always lead you to happiness. Loving someone with all your heart does not guarantee that it would be returned. Gaining fame and fortune does not guarantee happiness. Accepting a good word from an influential superior to cut your trip short up the career ladder is not always bad, especially if you are highly qualified and competent. There are too many possible outcomes, which your really cannot control. The only thing you have power over is the decisions that you will make, and how you would act and react to different situations.
Wrong decisions are always at hindsight.
Had you known that you were making a wrong decision, would you have gone along with it? Perhaps not, why would you choose a certain path when you know it would get you lost? Why make a certain decision if you knew from the very beginning that it is not the right one. It is only after you have made a decision and reflected on it that you realize its soundness. If the consequences or outcomes are good for you, then you have decided correctly. Otherwise, your decision was wrong.
Take the risk: decide.
Since life offers no guarantee and you would never know that your decision would be wrong until you have made it, then you might as well take the risk and decide. It is definitely better than keeping yourself in limbo. Although it is true that one wrong turn could get you lost, it could also be that such a turn could be an opportunity for an adventure, moreover open more roads. It is all a matter of perspective. You have the choice between being a lost traveller or an accidental tourist of life. But take caution that you do not make decisions haphazardly. Taking risks is not about being careless and stupid. Here are some pointers that could help you choose the best option in the face of life’s crossroads:
· Get as many information as you can about your situation.
You cannot find the confidence to decide when you know so little about what you are faced with. Just like any news reporter, ask the 5 W’s: what, who, when, where, and why. What is the situation? Who are the people involved? When did this happen? Where is this leading? Why are you in this situation? These are just some of the possible questions to ask to know more about your situation. This is important. Oftentimes, the reason for indecision is the lack of information about a situation.
· Identify and create options.
What options do the situation give you? Sometimes the options are few, but sometimes they are numerous. But what do you do when you think that the situation offers no options? This is the time that you create your own. Make your creative mind work. From the most simplistic to the most complicated, entertain all ideas. Do not shoot anything down when an idea comes to your head. Sometimes the most outrageous idea could prove to be the right one in the end. You can ask a friend to help you identify options and even make more options if you encounter some difficulty, but make sure that you make the decision yourself in the end.
· Weigh the pros and cons of every option.
Assess each option by looking at the advantages and disadvantages it offers you. In this way, you get more insights about the consequences of such an option.
· Trust yourself and make that decision.
Now that you have assessed your options, it is now time to trust yourself. Remember that there are no guarantees and wrong decisions are always at hindsight. So choose… decide… believe that you are choosing the best option at this point in time.
Now that you have made a decision, be ready to face its consequences: good and bad. It may take you to a place of promise or to a land of problems. But the important thing is that you have chosen to live your life instead of remaining a bystander or a passive audience to your own life. Whether it is the right decision or not, only time can tell. But do not regret it whatever the outcome. Instead, learn from it and remember that you always have the chance to make better decisions in the future.
"Two men look out through the same bars: One sees the mud, and one sees the stars."- Frederick Langbridge, A Cluster of Quiet Thoughts
If you’ve placed second in a writing contest, will you jump for joy and push for better results the next time or will you be discouraged and find an excuse not to join again?
In life, you are always filled with choices. You may opt to have a pessimist’s view and live a self-defeated life or you may decide to take the optimist’s route and take a challenging and fulfilling life.
So why nurture an optimist’s point of view? And why now?
Well, optimism has been linked to positive mood and good morale; to academic, athletic, military, occupational and political success; to popularity; to good health and even to long life and freedom from trauma.
On the other hand, the rates of depression and pessimism have never been higher. It affects middle-aged adults the same way it hits younger people. The mean age of onset has gone from 30 to 15. It is no longer a middle-aged housewife’s disorder but also a teen-ager’s disorder’ as well.
Here’s how optimists are in action and researches that back up why it really pays to be an optimist:
Optimists expect the best
The defining characteristic of pessimists is that they tend to believe bad events, which will last a long time and undermine everything they do, are their own fault.
The truth is optimists are confronted with the same hard knocks of this world. What differs is the way they explain their misfortune---it’s the opposite way. They tend to believe defeat is just a temporary setback, that its causes are confined to this one case.
Optimists tend to focus on and plan for the 'problem' at hand. They use 'positive reinterpretation.' In other words, they most likely reinterpret a negative experience in a way that helps them learn and grow. Such people are unfazed by bad situation, they perceive it is a challenge and try harder.
They won’t say “things will never get better,” “If I failed once, it will happen again” and “If I experience misfortune in one part of my life, then it will happen in my whole life.”
Positive expectancies of optimists also predict better reactions during transitions to new environments, sudden tragedies and unlikely turn of events. If they fall, they will stand up. They see opportunities instead of obstacles.
People respond positively to optimists
Optimists are proactive and less dependent on others for their happiness. They find no need to control or manipulate people. They usually draw people towards them. Their optimistic view of the world can be contagious and influence those they are with.
Optimism seems a socially desirable trait in all communities. Those who share optimism are generally accepted while those who spread gloom, panic and hysteria are treated unfavorably.
In life, these people often win elections; get voted most congenial and sought for advice.
When the going gets tough, optimists get tougher
Optimists typically maintain higher levels of subjective well-being during times of stress than do people who are less optimistic. In contrast, pessimists are likely to react to stressful events by denying that they exist or by avoiding dealing with problems. Pessimists are more likely to quit trying when difficulties arise.
They persevere. They just don’t give up easily, they are also known for their patience. Inching their way a step closer to that goal or elusive dream.
Optimists are healthier and live longer
Medical research has justified that simple pleasures and a positive outlook can cause a measurable increase in the body's ability to fight disease.
Optimists’ health is unusually good. They age well, much freer than most people from the usual physical ills of middle age. And they get to outlive those prone to negative thoughts.
So why not be an optimist today? And think positively towards a more fulfilled life.
Why not look forward to success in all your endeavors? Why not be resilient? Like everybody else you are bound to hit lows sometimes but don’t just stay there. Carry yourself out of the mud and improve your chances of getting back on the right track. And why not inspire others to remove their dark-colored glasses and see life in the bright side?
It might take a little coffee or probably a few rounds of beer or any other booze you could get your hands on when it comes to relaxing after a hard day's work. Well, yeah I'm guilty about that one as well, unless I'm caught dead wearing a lampshade over my head after a few rounds of vodka… half-naked! Okay, bad example and I apologize to everyone reading this after getting nightmares about me in that state of drunken stupor.
Just don't ask how it happened, please.
But what's really interesting is that how do people go through the usual part of life when faced with vein-popping stress? I mean, the new age thing like Zen or yoga is one of the good things and it actually works. Is there room for the intellectual side of people who can actually smell the roses-in-a-can while on the move? It kind of had me thinking that there really must be something in this 'mind-over-matter' thing.
Humor is indeed the best medicine there is whenever you are. I mean anyone can pay good money to listen to a comedian just to make you wet your pants after laughing so hard. Despite of what's been happening, and to those who has gone though the ordeal, it's better to just laugh while facing the troubles with a clear mind than anger with a clouded vision. One of my favorite celebrities of all time may have to be Woody Allen. Now this is one guy who gives you the in-your-face bluntness that he pulls out with gusto, even without even trying. You can talk just about anything with a man, and he's bound to mock the subject and you'll end up laughing rather than being upset about it.
Woody Allen has this to say:
1. "Money is better than poverty, if only for financial reasons." It sounds good to me, I mean the practicality of all things does involve money but it doesn't have to take an arm and a leg to get it.
2. "I believe there is something out there watching us. Unfortunately, it's the government." 'Nuff said.
3. "There are worse things in life than death. Have you ever spent an evening with an insurance salesman?" This happens to be one of the classic ones. I mean the issue about life's little problems isn't all that bad, until 'he' shows up.
Sure, relationships can get complicated, or does have its complications that probably any author about relationships is bound to discover it soon. We follow what our heart desires, unless you're talking about the heart as in the heart that pump blood throughout your body.
4. "Love is the answer, but while you're waiting for the answer, sex raises some pretty interesting questions." And if you want more, just keep on asking!
5. "A fast word about oral contraception. I asked a girl to go to bed with me, she said 'no'." It sounds, 'practical', I think.
And when it comes to everyday life, he really knows how to make the best out of every possible scenario, and it doesn't involve a lawsuit if he strikes a nerve.
6. "Basically my wife was immature. I'd be at home in the bath and she'd come in and sink my boats." I never had a boat in my bathtub before. Just staring at it while soaking in hot water makes me seasick already.
7. "I am not afraid of death, I just don't want to be there when it happens." If it rains, it pours.
8. "I am thankful for laughter, except when milk comes out of my nose." It could get worse when you're guzzling on beer… or mouthwash, and it happened to me once!
9. "If you want to make God laugh, tell him about your plans." At least he doesn't smite us with lightning, and I'm thankful for that.
And despite of what may happen to all of us in the next ten, twenty, or even thirty years, I guess we all have to see things in a different kind of light and not just perspective. I can't seem to imagine life without any piece of wisdom that could guide us. Whether we're religious or not, it takes more courage to accept your fears and learn how to deal with them is all that matters when it comes to even just getting along.
And to sum things up, here is the last nugget of wisdom to go by… however, whenever, and wherever we may be.
10. "The talent for being happy is appreciating and liking what you have, instead of what you don't have."
Ciao!
Anger, a normal emotion, can transform into something painful and ugly. First thoughts of anger issues may bring about images of a couple fighting, a parent abusing a child, a teenager lashing out at a teacher or a parent. Rarely will images of angry children come to mind. Unfortunately children, at very young ages, have to deal with feelings of anger and rage. This is a truth which is often difficult to understand or manage.
Children, young children especially, aren't normally aware of how they feel. When a child becomes upset or mad they simply show these emotions through their behavior. A good example of this might be the little boy in the supermarket who throws a tantrum because he's upset. Many parents have had to deal with similar situations. It is unfortunate that often times these occurrences are overlooked or dismissed because they are "just children". Anger management in children is as important, or perhaps even more important than anger management in adults.
A child requires instruction and guidance from their coming into the world to their entry into adulthood. The things they learn throughout their young lives are likely to form the person they become as an adult. For this reason anger management in children with difficulties controlling their temper is extremely important. Finding ways to teach anger management in children might present challenges.
There are programs designed specifically for children with anger management issues. Finding one that works for a particular child might require testing many methods. Not all children will respond to the same treatments for anger management in children. Because a child cannot always relate their feelings surrounding angry outburst, finding the right approach may take some time. Until the issue is resolved or at least controlled, it is imperative to continue the search.
Young children may respond well to worksheets, games and fun activities. All of these can be used effectively to teach anger management in children. Developing programs which incorporate each of these might be the best route to take. A child completing a worksheet, coloring sheet or participating in games and activities with underlying messages regarding anger management, may not even realize they are working on their problem. Making the activity fun doesn't mean that the anger issue has to be left out. Choosing fun activities which teach healthy interaction and decision making might be good for anger management in children. Teaching them to take turns and helping them to learn that they can't always be the best or the winner would definitely make a difference when confrontational situations arise. Little activities which instill values and positive thinking would be beneficial for anger management in children.
If a child is old enough to talk about their anger problem, encouraging them to share their feelings is important. Suggesting they talk to someone who they feel comfortable with and trust is a good idea regarding anger management in children. Asking them to write or draw about their emotions may be able to help disclose their underlying issues, whether fear, hurt or sadness. Teaching them to ask for help when they feel threatened or angry would certainly help the child with a problem. The important detail to realize when considering anger management in children are they are just "children". Their minds are not equipped to handle big people situations and so they will require a more careful approach.
Anger is an emotion experienced by kids and adults alike. When something or someone interferes with an individual in a negative manner, it can cause them to become angry. Anger is a normal response to such a situation. However anger can be classed as a mild or intense irritation. Depending on the individual, the circumstance and their emotions, anger may cause a person to become enraged or even furious. People who become angry behave in different ways. Some lash out or become extremely defensive. Other people tend to keep their anger to themselves, bottling up their negative emotions and hurt. While some people become reckless and even abusive. Anger can be a terribly harmful emotion if it isn't controlled.
Controlling anger is considered anger management. The first step to controlling anger issues it to admit there is a problem. Some people have major anger issues but cannot see it. Naturally something happens to set a person off making them angry. Individuals, who have trouble admitting to their anger and accepting responsibility for their actions, often play the blame game. They have difficulty seeing the situation as being their fault. There's always something or someone to blame. Their fits of anger are always blamed on something else. These people could really use a few lessons in anger management. However they need to accept their actions and reactions for what they are, anger.
Many people who have anger issues find it demeaning when anger management is suggested. Unable to accept their problem prevents them from seeking the help they require. If a person continues down a path where they are constantly angry and acting out, it will eventually cause major problems. Without anger management this individual will likely experience loss, loss of their family, loss of their job and loss of their own identity.
It is essential to convince the person with anger problems, anger management is not meant to be a punishment but rather to help them have a better quality of life. Anger management is designed to help the individual work out their problems, help them figure out why they become so angry. It also teaches the person not to be enslaved by their emotions, their anger. Anger management is meant to teach the person techniques which prevent them from getting angry as often or for very long.
There are all sorts of anger management strategies. There are programs created specifically to help those with anger issues. These programs are broken down to address different people, kids, teens, adults, couples and families. These anger management programs are in place to teach or help people to work on their anger. Teaching people strategies for working out their problems and controlling their anger are important in anger management.
Anger may be a healthy, normal emotion but when the anger takes over an individual's life making them destructive and violent, it's a big problem. Not only does the anger destroy the individual but it also impacts everyone and everything around them. Anger management could change this individual and ensure a healthy, normal life.
When you get sick, you go to the doctor. And the doctor will, of course, prescribe medicines. You will go and buy medicines. You take them, and hopefully, you get well.
This is how the health profession goes on nowadays – a cycle of diagnosis and prescription.
If anyone were to give you herbs for medicine, you would probably say that that person was a quack.
But nowadays, studies are being conducted to see if there are really is any merit to what is called natural medicine.
Natural medicine is the use of natural methods, herbal medicines, and traditional practices to heal ailments. Every culture has a form of natural medicine. In ancient cultures, village medicine men served as the doctors of the community, passing on medical knowledge to the apprentices that followed them.
Many categories of the healing methods fall under natural medicine. Among these are traditional medicine, complementary medicine, and alternative medicine.
Usually, natural medicine refers to medical practices that were in place before the advent of modern medicine.
This includes herbal medicine, or phytotherapy, which is prevalent in Chinese, Ayurvedic(or Indian), and Greek medicine.
Upon the advent of modern medicine, many professionals discarded the use of herbs in favor of man-made medicine. The fact that these treatments are based on the healing properties of some herbs was forgotten.
For example, opium, digitalis, quinine, and aspirin all have their roots in traditional medicine.
Natural medicine can be considered as a lost art. This does not mean that it has lost efficacy over time. In some cases, natural therapy is actually better than modern medicine. This leads some doctors to seriously consider and study the possible uses of natural medicine
Before we continue, it is important to stress that not all the natural remedies are legitimate. It would help to only try those remedies which have been thoroughly studied and are relatively risk free.
Take herbal medicine for example. There are many well-documented and studied herbal remedies available. However, only those that deal with minor ailments such as cough, colds, fever, skin rashes, and its ilk are likely to be recommended by health professionals. These remedies are sometimes superior to synthetic medicine. This is because herbal medicines are less likely to cause negative side effects.
Currently there are numerous organizations that study the effects and advocacy of natural medicine – among which is herbal medicine. Some governments and health agencies openly advocate the use of natural methods since they are inexpensive and relatively risk-free.
As their studies compile, more herbs and treatments are added to the list of accepted medicines. However, many herbs and treatments have been proven to be bogus medicine. This represents a challenge for both the user and the agencies because they have to ascertain that the treatments they either use or advocate are legitimate.
There exist today many alternative medical treatments that fall under natural medicine. However, not all of them have been proven to be effective. You could mention homeopathy, aromatherapy, acupuncture, and other alternative medical treatments. It would pay to consult the experts as to the legitimacy of these treatments.
Natural medicine should also be thought of as an accompanying medicine. Right now, the current collective medical thought suggests that natural medicine be used only to supplement accepted modern medical practices. In that case of minor ailments your expert we actually advise you to take natural therapies instead.
The practice of modern medicine revolves around diagnosing an illness and prescribing treatments for such. Natural medicine is helpful because it suggests that treatment be not necessarily given only when sick. Natural medicine strives to make each patient practice good health habits. These habits include good diet, healthy living, and the regular natural treatment.
It is this same line of thought that leads our parents to tell us to eat our vegetables. Yes, a healthy lifestyle and will do no harm to our well-being. And this is the foundation of natural medicine – may it be massage, herbal medicine, aromatherapy or others.
It is funny but true that science, in its quest for excellence, is studying the knowledge of sages past. This, surprisingly, leads us back to the remedies nature offers. The possibilities of finding remedies to everyday illnesses in natural medicine are encouraging. So staying tuned to studying these remedies is worthwhile until we can verify that these therapies are truly helpful to our health and our society.
Posts
